A global warming theory

Thank goodness we had snow during the Christmas holiday. We could ski nearly every day of our two-week break. Since then, the weather has warmed up considerably, to the point that we have been sunbathing in T-shirts in front of the house.

The sun has done wonders for our Vitamin D levels but wrecked havoc on the snow. Grey-green patches are now visible on many a southwest-facing slope. Some mountains have closed their lifts.

With worried frowns on their faces, locals say in hushed voices: "This is April weather. It doesn't look good for the rest of ski season. We need more snow."

With temperatures hovering around 10 C, it's even too warm for snow machines that work best when temperatures stay below -5 C. I don't like snow machines. They are ugly. They use too much electricity and water. Mostly, I don't like them because they are just band-aid solutions to the bigger problem, that the earth is warming up and that we are unwilling to reduce our use of gasoline and electricity.

Sure, I benefitted from snow-making while skiing over the holidays. Sections of slope that used to get scrapped up, icy, and bare, were well covered with artificial snow, making the the whole run much more enjoyable than before. Once back in my car, I was happy "Ah, that was a good day skiing," I thought. Instead of having the following thought: "Yikes! That sucked! The base was too thin. We don't have enough snow. Perhaps, we should really DO something against global warming."

Meanwhile, we read in the news that the USA has been slammed with yet another snow storm, bringing out the global warming naysayers. I have a theory.  The USA, holder of the "World's Worst Polluter Award," has the strongest anti-environmental rhetoric, because it gets the coldest weather. You see, pollution emitted by the USA rises into the atmosphere and travels with the winds to Europe, where the glaciers are melting and the snow falls are diminishing.  It's like living downstream from a polluter.

The USA is experiencing meters of snow and cold weather. Americans don't feel the effects of global warming, explaining why they don't believe in climate change. So I will join my European friends in being angry at the USA for melting our glaciers and our snow; in the meantime, I'll work on my tan.